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Friday, September 09, 2005

Paris: I'm not sexual -- she really must love burgers!

Even though she basically made-out with a burger in a racy Carl's Jr. commerical, Paris Hilton says she's not a sexual person.

In an upcoming interview with Vanity Fair, the Simple Life star said she'd much rather hang out at home with her fiance Paris Latsis than go clubbing.

Hilton said: "I think I'm sexual in pictures and the way I dress and my whole image, but at home I'm really not like that.

Didn't someone, sometime, somewhere put up a certain tape of hers on the internet?

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Blame it on love!

Forty-two percent of teenagers who say they are virgins are waiting to meet the right person, according to a study by Teen People magazine.

The publication surveyed more than 4,000 virgins and 1,500 non-virgins between the ages of 12 and 24, asking different questions to each group.

Forty-two percent of those who are sexually active say they are in love.

Thirty-nine percent of the virgins have taken a pledge to save sex for marriage. Only 6 percent of that group said they have given and received oral sex.

But that will al change onece they got laid just once...

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Tonight's special: donkey meat spiked with tiger urine -- yum!

The cat is out of the bag at a restaurant in northeast China that had been serving donkey meat spiked with tiger urine in pricey dishes advertised as endangered Siberian tigers.

Local media in Heilongjiang province got wind the restaurant was offering stir-fried dishes and medicinal liquor made from tiger meat and bones, sparking local police and health inspectors to pounce, the China Daily said today.
"After inspection, the owner confessed that the so-called tiger meat was donkey meat that had been dressed with tiger urine to give the dish a 'special' flavour," the newspaper said.

The restaurant had been charging as much as $131 a dish for the illegal, "rare" fare, tapping into traditional Chinese belief that tiger meat has aphrodisiacal properties.

The restaurant was shut down and fined.

The director of the nearby Hengdaohezi Siberian Tiger Park, China's largest centre for breeding the highly endangered animals, reassured the public there was no way meat from its big cats had made its way to the dinner table, the newspaper said.

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Never say burger!

A word of advice. Never use the phrase "just a burger" with Nancy Silverton. I did and was promptly challenged on every aspect of burger making, starting with where to buy the meat, what grind, size of patty, how to cook it, what to serve with it, what pickle, what bun, what ketchup, what mayonnaise, what mustard, what cheese, how thick to slice the avocado, what bacon, what smoke on the bacon, what occasion.

The co-founder of Campanile restaurant and La Brea Bakery in the Los Angeles area may be famous for more sophisticated food, but to her, the burger is one of the great American dishes, and exactly the thing that she likes to give friends for an end-of-summer barbecue. To prove it, she immediately threw a party.

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Get in touch with nature

Get ready for the inaugural World Naked Gardening Day (WNGD)! People across the globe are encouraged, on September 10, 2005, to tend their portion of the world's garden clothed as nature intended.

Gardening has a timeless quality, and anyone can do it: young and old, singles or groups, the fit and infirm, urban and rural. An elderly lady in a Manhattan apartment can plant new annuals in her window box. Families can rake leaves in their back yard. Freehikers can pull invasive weeds along their favorite stretch of trail. More daring groups can make rapid clothes-free sorties into public parks to do community-friendly stealth cleanups.

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Think your mom's embarrassing -- think again!

Mom! Please stop! I told you before that my friends only came over for studying on our computer science project! So don't climb on their laps for a game of tongue tennis!

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Thursday, September 08, 2005

And the Weakest Link is -- or is it funniest link?

The funniest and best list of Weakest Link answers. Contestants from the BBC's Weakest Link quiz game-show are asked general-knowlege questions under pressure, which produces some very funny wrong answers (that's their excuse....) The Weakest Link show is still shown on BBC TV and is an excellent source of funny answers and amusing material for speeches, presentations, training diversions, etc. The answers are funny in themselves, and also illustrate the peculiar workings of the brain and how people don't always know what they think they know, or say what they mean to say.

Via

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Ever wonder what else can you do with those breasts?

If there's anything sexier than a woman crushing beer cans with her huge disgusting breasts, I don't want to know what it is. Because it would be too sexy. And I would die.


Were those empty cans or not? That would make it even more spectacular...

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Christina's million dollar song

If you're planning your wedding and you've got a few million quid to spare, why not hire Christina Aguilera to perform some of her greatest hits for your guests?

That's what Russian billionaire businessman Andrey Melnichenko did - offering the Dirrty singer a whopping £1.2m to sing just two songs at his wedding bash in the South of France.

But apparently it was money well spent.

"Christina did a brilliant job," said one wedding guest. "There wasn't a dry eye in the house when she sang Beautiful."

"But no-one suspected how much she'd been paid - it's like winning the Lottery for her."

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Band singer nab for wearing police uniform -- no this is not Village People!

It would never happen to the lead singer of the Village People, but Sydney band member Jake Stone will think twice before wearing a police uniform on stage again.

Stone, 25, was dragged off stage and arrested mid-gig for wearing a police shirt as part of his act during a performance at Sydney's Metro Theatre. The frontman of funk, hip-hop band Blue Juice was then charged with impersonating a police officer.

But the bizarre incident has ended with a magistrate dismissing the case in the Downing Centre Local Court.

Not only was the charge against him thrown out, Stone was awarded $800 costs after Deputy Chief Magistrate Helen Syme found there was no case to answer.

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Free orgasm implant, anyone volunteer?

A scientist claiming to have invented a device which produces orgasms at the touch of a button can't find women to help him conduct trials into it.

The implant, inserted under the skin at the base of the spine, triggers a reflex response to produce sensation.

Dr Stuart Meloy, from North Carolina, told New Scientist: "I thought people would be beating my door down."

However, British experts said that a surgical implant was not an appropriate answer to women's sexual problems.

The US Food and Drug Administration has approved trials of the device, but this cannot go ahead until enough volunteers have been found.

Dr Meloy - originally a pain specialist - stumbled on the concept when he inserted a pacemaker-like device under the skin in a bid to alleviate severe back pain in a patient.

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Fired for being sexy?

Was it her looks or lifestyle that led the Roman Catholic Church to cause a minor media frenzy by firing an Italian religion teacher this year?

Caterina Bonci said Church authorities decided she was just too attractive and dressed too sexy to teach religion after 14 years on the job. The Church says it sacked the 38-year-old blonde from the central Adriatic city of Fano because she is divorced.

Who do you think is right, Caterina (picture included, suspicious name by the way) or the Church?

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Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Train did not wake up drunk Russian

A Russian man who fell asleep on rail tracks did not wake up when a 40-carriage cargo train passed over him, which saved his life, Interfax reported Monday.

The man, 23, had drunk too much and fallen asleep between railway tracks near the village of Dmitrievka in Russia’s Far Eastern region of Amur.

The train driver saw a man lying on the rails and used the emergency brake, but the train still went over the man’s body. Luckily it managed to pass over without even as much as scratching the man, the local law enforcement agency told Interfax.

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Never turn down a lapdancer...

An angry San Diego topless dancer pulled out a knife and stabbed a customer after he refused a lap dance, police said on Thursday.

Lawanda Dixon, 24, was arrested for assault with a deadly weapon shortly after the altercation with 33-year-old Melik Jordan at the Dream Girls Cabaret early on Wednesday, San Diego police Det. Gary Hassen said.

"He was in the club with some friends watching the shows when she came up and asked if he wanted a lap dance," Hassen said. "He said no, she got upset about it, they argued back and forth. She pulled knife out of her bag and stabbed him."

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You have 15 minutes of fame, what do you do?

Like Andy Warhol once said: In the future everyone will be world-famous for 15 minutes

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Yummy mummy goes to...

Gorgeous actress Kate Winslet has been voted Britain’s top “yummy mummy” in a poll.

The Titanic star, 30, — mum to Mia, four and 21-month-old tot Joe — resisted the urge to diet after their births and opted instead to slowly re- gain her curvy figure.

Second in the survey was Jordan, back in hotpants just weeks after giving birth to baby Junior.

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Coins don't count!

A Mother who saved up £235 in pound coins towards her family's holiday of a lifetime was outraged that her bank refused to accept the cash when she tried to pay it into her savings account. Marie Edwards took the bag of coins to the Halifax branch in Yate shopping centre but was told by a cashier and the manager that they would not take large deposits in coins.

She was told there was not enough room in the safe.

Mrs Edwards, who is taking her family on a dream holiday to Disneyworld, Florida, said she was stunned when the bank declined to count the coins into her account and then let her draw it out in notes.

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Dispute in the Hilton family!

There was a bit of a dispute within the Hilton family and they couldn't decide which side they were on. But these things run in the best of families, I guess. I think I would be on the Jolie team as well, but we could well do without this Paris woman.

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Very interesting commentary

Very interesting commentary regarding the Katrina disaster. We all need to see clearly now.

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Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Women's most embarrassing boob!

Women have voted getting loo roll stuck to their shoe as their most embarrassing boob - ahead of that sinking 'Tara Reid' feeling when breasts pop out of a skimpy top.

But leaving their fly undone is men's biggest dread followed by accidentally breaking wind in public, a survey shows.

Women identify problems with their appearance as the most common cause of their blushes, according to the Nuts magazine poll of 3,000 adults aged 18 to 34.

Breasts escaping (64%), trapping their skirt in knickers (61%), smudging their make-up (58%), and lipstick on teeth (55%) all made their top five red-faced antics.

But perhaps surprisingly they all trailed well behind the ultimate fashion faux pas of having toilet paper stuck to their shoe (72%).

Heel stuck in a drain (47%) was sixth ahead of displaying an unknown bogie (42%), 'doing a Marilyn or Amy Nuttall' with a skirt blowing up in the wind (40%), losing your bikini in the pool (26%) and getting stuck in train doors (12%).

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Fun on that bull!

Her friends told her they had fun on that bull. First she didn't want to try it herself, but her friends convinced her to take that rdie anyway. She had fun, her friends had fun and now we can have fun.

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King of all dorks!

Who is Dorkman, you ask? It is I, King of all Dorks! If you are a frustrated dork searching for meaning in your miserable life, you came to the right place. For all of you non-dorks, this site can give you valuable insight into the dork mind.

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Pictures from rock history

Sex and drugs have been associated with rock ‘n’ roll from its very beginnings. But what about finely granulated sugar? Corn syrup? Yellow dye #5? The recipe for musical magic includes all of these and more. Presented here for your edification are several snapshots from rock history, as seen through the little wax eyes of colorful marshmallow chicks and bunnies.

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A Church holiday!

When you're well-known all over the world, it is hard to celebrate holidays with your loved-ones without some paparazzi turning up. When Charlotte Church went on vacation, this was no different.

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Johnny Depp's son calls him a weirdo!

Johnny Depp has been branded an eccentric for playing a recluse with scissors for hands and a delusional Don Juan. This time his own son is calling him a weirdo for his role as crazy candyman Willy Wonka.

The Hollywood heartthrob said he invited his children to watch him dress up in his slick jacket and top hat to shoot Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, the latest film version of British writer Roald Dahl's kids classic.

Depp, in Tokyo ahead of the Japanese release of Tim Burton's movie, said his three-year-old son was astonished and told his dad: "You are really weird."

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Monday, September 05, 2005

Naked men swam to Lost set to begged for jobs

Filming on the new series of Lost had to be halted last week when two naked fans swam onto the beach set and begged for jobs.

Dominic Monaghan and Matthew Fox were shooting a scene together in Hawaii when the two buxom babes started bobbing about by the shore.

And when 'cut' was called the two superfans came out of the waves and started walking up the beach.

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Brad and Jen's wedding photo left to rot

Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston have reportedly left a massive photo taken on their wedding day to rot in their former marital home.

The five foot photograph captures a moment on their wedding day when they happily sipped cocktails together with their married lives ahead of them.

Their divorce has now been granted and it seems that neither Pitt nor Aniston want to take the photo under their wing to cherish. An estate agent dealing with their former home came across it and attempted to return it to either one of the pair, but neither was interested in keeping it.

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Thieves pushed safe to train to smash it open

Thieves in Austria nearly derailed a passenger train after pushing a 15 kilogram stolen safe on to the track in the hope a speeding locomotive would smash it open, Austrian police say.

A spokesman for the local police near Bregenz, west Austria, says the force of the collision had indeed opened the safe, "but nearly all the money was thrown out and the perpetrators had to flee".

"The locomotive was very badly damaged and there was nearly a derailment," Michael Haider said.

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Who needs a good beating?

Our writers went to the lab to scientifically uncover the 50 people most in need of a vicious beating. We aren’t talking about a run-of-the-mill beat down. We are talking about an “I’m gonna call a couple of hard, pipe hittin’ niggas to come down here and work on the homes with a pair of pliers and blow torch” kind of beating. We are talking about the kind of battery that leaves you thankful just to be alive—an Alberto Gonzales-approved-enemy-combatant-bring-you-back-from-the-dead-with-a-defibrillator-and-
then-beat-you-some-more kind of working over—the kind of shit that leaves you with a lazy eye and lisp. We are thinking some Jack Bauer “24” shit, but without the dramatic Sean Callery score.


And when you have finished the list, who else needs a good beating?

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Who did it?

You may become red faced when she turns around and demands to know who touched her butt.

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Pizza machine!

Wonder Pizza of Italy will place America 's most popular food source in places never before available.

The innovative machine holds, cooks and serves 9” whole pizza pies in just 2 minutes. There are 3 different pizzas available in each machine at one time. Delicious Connie’s Pizza of Chicago is featured in all WonderPizza Kiosks. 5 years and 6 million dollars of R&D went into this design and subsequent manufacture of WonderPizza of Italy and the product is now beginning worldwide distribution.

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